RussWorld - Russ's Rules


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	Russ's Rules Someone once said, "Good Judgement comes from Experience, and Experience comes from Bad Judgement." Someone else once said, "Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me!" And another once said, "It is not important whether you make mistakes, it is only important that you learn from them." In the spirit of those quotes, I present to you Russ's Rules. These are the rules for living that I have discovered on my short journey through life. Some are serious, most are not, and more than a few of them only work for my idiosyncratic self. When it's over, it's over! This applies mostly to relationships, a lesson I learned really hard when my first girlfriend broke up with me and asked for me back four times, breaking my heart each time. The first break-up never takes. This may seem to contradict the previous rule. But unless that first break-up involves court orders, you should really consider just apologizing and getting back together. You must wait six months before you can be "just friends." If indeed you have broken up, do not see, speak to, telephone, follow, stalk, or otherwise attempt to communicate with your ex until six months have passed. Trust me on this one. Never say "I love you" to a woman unless you would take a bullet for her. Those three little words have an entirely different meaning to the fairer sex, and you should use more caution with them than nitro-glycerin. Sing with passion and play like you mean it. Nothing upsets me more than musicians who are merely going through the motions. Passion is the difference between your old grandpa who retells the same story every year and Mick Jagger. The next day does not begin until I sleep and wake up. This especially applies to those of us with nocturnal schedules. To us, 2AM Saturday is really still Friday Night. This leads to the corollary... If you see two sunrises in the same day, you're borrowing one from the end of your life. Go to bed and get some sleep! Never pierce any body part associated with your body's fluids. You shouldn't need to be told this, but some people will pierce the strangest things... Never get a tattoo where a judge can see it. This also helps you with job interviews. Smile... especially when you don't feel like smiling. It makes others wonder what you are up to. Try not to ever go inside your favorite drive-thru fast-food joint. there are probably things there you really would rather not see. Never lie, but always try to find a tactful way of being honest. This may not apply to those of you better at lying than I am. Commas should be used as list separators, a.k.a. "the serial comma". I'm told that the proper way to use a comma in a list is like so: I ate steak, salad and a potato. I think that is wrong, I think that sentence should read: I ate steak, salad, and a potato. The first sentence implies (to me) two groups of items, the "steak", and the "salad and potato". I think it also helps avoid confusion. What if you had to write "I like blues, soul, and rock and roll." If you wrote that the "proper" way, you'd be wondering what "soul and rock and roll" was. Punctuation should be used outside of quotes and parenthesis. You probably figured that out just from reading my above examples. To me, a quotation mark signifies something that is separate or highlighted in a sentence. Including punctuation inside the quotes implies (to me) that the punctuation is part of the quoted object. "Star Wars", for example, is a movie, not "Star Wars." Always wear your seatbelts or motorcycle helmet when traveling in/on your vehicle. I think the worst thing you could ever see would be that helmet still locked to the side of your motorcycle after you've wrecked and lay dying from massive head trauma.